Do you love her more if you spend $2 million on the bling, or if you drop a quarter in the machine next to the gumballs, and the ring is plastic? Which says “I love you” the loudest?See – you already know this.
Today is Over-Hyped Day, a holiday that screams “spend money and prove your love.” Perfect day to be rich, so that your emotions really count. As if.
So if you love like Rodeo Drive, but live like the Taco Bell value menu -- a few tips for today, gentlemen:
1) The $4 banquet. This works at Panera Bread, but you can improvise at Caribou or Starbucks or that great little no-name coffee place you both love. Here’s the menu: Two (2) muffies (sliced-off muffin tops), Two (2) waters (not artesian or artisan, just agua), One (1) coffee to share, and a table by the fireplace or over there in the corner. Limited PDA is way okay, but please save the fireworks for after you get a room.
2) The $2 truffle. Many women love chocolate, but don’t want to wear an entire box on their hips or waistline. A single indulgence is better. Most malls have a vendor that will sell you an amazing chocolate truffle (so many flavors, so many choices!) for around $2. Look for a candy store or a chocolate factory and if truffles don’t do it, why not a cupcake? They’re everywhere.
3) The free foot rub. Choose your moment, and rub it like you mean it. Chill dude, and let her decide whether it’s foreplay or not. Not everything has to be foreplay, unless you want even more diaper bags around the house? Besides, the best foreplay pays off days later, not just right this minute. Romance is a marathon, not a sprint.
People who spend large sums of money are often over-compensating for something. Or maybe they’re just stinking rich, God bless them.
If you’ve just had an amazing year, income-wise, and you want to bling her out --- please do. But if you’re between opportunities or currently under-employed, no worries. Get off the computer and answer the real call of duty, okay?
